inane meanderings of the roving mind... adapting to the vicissitudes of life: May 2011

Faith

"It is Jesus that you seek when you dream of happiness; he is waiting for you when nothing else you find satisfies you; he is the beauty to which you are so attracted; it is he who provokes you with that thirst for fullness that will not let you settle for compromise; it is he who urges you to shed the masks of a false life; it is he who reads in your hearts your most genuine choices, the choices that others try to stifle. It is Jesus who stirs in you the desire to do something great with your lives, the will to follow an ideal, the refusal to allow yourselves to be grounded down by mediocrity, the courage to commit yourselves humbly and patiently to improving yourselves and society..."

-Pope John Paul II-

NOTE

This blog is an online journal, not so much a photo-blog. I might put up pics of things and places, but not me.

I blog, not so much for attention, not so much for fame, but mostly for Catharsis.

I need a place to write and think. I need a place where I could write to reach out. This is it.

Because sometimes it's easier to talk to semi-strangers, than to the people who knows you. Because sometimes it's less painful to lash out to the world in general than to keep things bottled up inside.

Sensitivity may be over-rated, but sensitivity is human.

If you're a stranger who stumbles unto this, I'm warning you that part of catharsis may be offensive. This blog is personal, it's not written to cater to the tastes of it's readers. I make no apologies for what I think. It's the personal opinion and experiences of one particular authoress.

If you don't like what is written, you're welcome to walk away, no apologies required either.

Let's both be civil to one another.

Unabashedly Me

I love many things about life. In no particular order:

Faith, religion, belief. Family. Close friends. Acquaintances.

The smile of a child. Affinity with animals.

A good conversation. Languages.

A good swim, a good run. A 3-hour dancing session. The satisfaction of having done something right.

Dark chocolate. Wildflowers. White lilies. Dark red and champagne roses. Good alcohol. Scents. Perfumes. Aromatherapy.

Nice hair. Soft, moisturised skin. A caress. A touch. 5 o'clock shadow on a man.

Pretty underthings. The feel of French lace against silk, silk against French lace.

The haunting poignancy of classical music. The angst and fervour of rock. The sexy innuendo of jazz. The sweaty pulsations of r'n'b and hip hop.

Sunrise at 21 000 feet. Sunset, and moonlit walks on the beach. The feel of sand beneath my feet. Gosh, I had almost forgotten how that feels....Dancing in the rain.

Watching the silver sleet of rain lashing against the window pane, having come out from a hot bath, a steaming cup of hot chocolate (with marshmallows!!) in hand.

The kiss of sun against skin. Long, sultry evenings in shade, iced drink in hand, in the skimpiest outfit social norms would allow :p

The scent of the earth after rain. Dark, stormy nights.
Reading a good book through the night, soft music in the background. Thoughts swirling in my mind.

The boisterous company of family and friends. The painful, but precious solitude of loneliness.

Euphoria. Suffering.

Weddings. Funerals.

Laughter. Tears.

The frail vulnerability of the human heart. The strong flexibility of the human spirit.

Life's many contradictions. The exquisite torture of being human.

In my years on earth, I've learnt the important lesson that: We'll never appreciate the sweet, until we've understood the bitter.

I LIVE. I LOVE. I LUST. I AM WOMAN. I MAKE NO APOLOGIES. AND I REFUSE TO BE ASHAMED.

Nemesis' Paradoxical Quote for the Moment

Ignorance may be Bliss, but Knowledge itself is Power. Therefore, take your pick: Bliss, or Power?

How is it that:
Familiarity breeds contempt, yet
Absence makes the heart grow fonder?

How about:
Opposites attract, but
Like must marry like, or there will be no happiness?

Nemesis' Answer to 'sola scriptura':

1. “So also our beloved brother Paul wrote to you according to the wisdom given him, speaking of this as he does in all his letters. There are some things in them hard to understand, which the ignorant and unstable twist to their own destruction, as they do the other scriptures.” (2 Pt 2:15-16)

2. “So then, brothers and sisters, stand firm and hold fast to the traditions that you were taught by us, either by word of mouth or by our letter.” (2 Ths 2:15)

Friday, May 06, 2011

Turning 30

How does it feel to be 30?

I'm still trying to figure it out :)

After a day of rumination, I suppose the politically correct epiphany would be: Young enough to still have fun and remember, old enough to stop and know better.

The less politically correct, credited to Irene, would be: Young enough to still wanna shake your booty, old enough to know when it's time to sit down before you sprain something :P

My hope for this chapter/ decade would be that I learn how to age with grace... under pressure :)

It's been quite a day... My teammates surprised (or sabo-ed?) me with a little birthday cake and a (really loud) happy birthday song in a crowded restaurant, and sang an (even louder!!!) happy birthday song once more in a crowded lunchtime MRT (ZOMGWTFCRAZYFELLAZLAWLZ) before surprising me again with a 'meeting' that turned out to be the official birthday surprise :P Thank you, MxTx team :) It's been a wonderful 1 year with all of you, past and present :) Bumpy rollercoaster crazy ride it may have been, but I think we've all weathered and matured much :) I'm going to cry now :P

It is interesting to start a new decade of my life in another country, and under different circumstances. Granted, last year I was already here, but I hadn't had time to stop, think and reflect, having just moved here about a month prior.

The outpouring of well wishes, affection and love was a little surprising and overwhelming though :) Thank you all. I was, and still am, deeply touched. It's true that friendship has no geographical boundaries. I've been receiving birthday wishes as early as 4 May, and although my silly facebook wall allowed no posts initially, I've had some friends spend the time to PM me their wishes, write on my status or my uploaded pics, or send me a message via phone/ IM/ other means of communication instead. I love you all much :) It's been a great pleasure, and honour to have met each and every one of you, somewhere along my journey in life.

I will stop now before I get uncharacteristically disgustingly mushy :) I've a reputation to uphold, after all :P This note is a reflection of where I am in my life right now, how far I've come, how much further I have yet to go, and how each and everyone of you, my friends, have left an indelible mark in this soft, pink-cotton-candy-fuwa-fuwa heart of mine :P

Thank you for your friendship. Thank you for your love. Thank you for being you. I shall now toast to the friendship we've had, and the many more years that will come :)

And now that I've written my uncharacteristically sentimental note, I shall retire to bed to preserve the youthfulness of my delicate skin ;) I have my occasional vain streak, as I do my occasional flashes of brilliance :P

Signing off,

Yours Truly :)

inane meanderings of the roving mind... adapting to the vicissitudes of life

Faith

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Friday, May 06, 2011

Turning 30