Sunday, November 26, 2006

Pics from JB

Pics from JB

Here are some pics taken mostly from Danga Bay, JB :) Honestly, it was a rather disgusting beach, but what would one expect of a strait, having Singapore on one side, and Johore on the other :P Time to go to either the East Coast, Sabah, or back home to Kuching for some nice beaches. Hehehe... Danga Bay is rather commercialised, though. Kinda like the Waterfront of Kuching. Though the Waterfront wasn't as gross, last I saw it.

BUT... let it not be said that I can't cam-whore. For effin'ssakes, I take pics of internal organs, and have to utilise TGC and shite like that, I sure as hell can use a digicam and take pics of external things... Uhmmm :P *note: cam-whoring pics not here. wahaha!*

To prove my point, I hogged my friend's digicam for a day.... with permission, but of course. Me is no rude cow....

1) Views from Foon Yew High School, and opposite the famous Foon Yew Rojak Petis Stall-so named because the 'uncle' peddles his rojak outside Foon Yew HS :P ohh... Foon Yew HS is facing a beach, and this is the beach from where I am taking pics.

Dilarang meletak kenderaan... obviously we weren't paying attention :P

View of Singapore from across the Strait.

Probably the nicest part of THIS particular stretch of beach.

Another view of Sg. from here.

Leaving what I'd refer to as 'Foon Yew HS beachstrip' and heading towards Danga Bay (which is rather nearby). The car stopped long enough at the traffic lights to let me take a view of this pier/jetty.

2) Danga Bay

Little boat... oohh.. little moving boat :P

Danga Bay Festive Street Mall: a fancy-schmancy name for a shopping complex. They have some nice bargain stuff. But I was broke, so I bought nothing :)

A pic of the street :P

There were a few lovely ?Malay houses here, and this was the nicest. Outside this house were many lovely orchid plants, in a variety of shapes and colours. There were other plants, too. And it got me all excited :) Love orchids, especially. Was in Orchid House in Secondary School, was in a Department for undergrad, where one of the most famous and notorious professors in the faculty and university was famed for her studies on orchids. Damn lab was filled with orchid plants :) Not that I was complaining. Most importantly, my mom plants orchids :) Too bad that as I was about to take pics of the plants, it started to rain rather heavily, and we had to run for shelter. By the time we got out, which was the time I took this pic, the plants were all covered :(

Danga Bay gateway

We got all excited when we saw this bird. Oh, you know. We don't get to see it in KL :P I've seen it in Kuching, though. By the way, can anyone tell me what this is? Heron? Egret? Stork? Ibis? I could never really tell the difference :)

Rays of light...

Cloud formation 1

Cloud formation 2

Calm not-so-blue sea :P

Again, cloud formation... and a vessel... :P

Danga Bay restaurants

Danga Bay beach

Lone boat floating...

Sunset over Danga Bay

Of course, being where we are, we must take pics of boats...

Aahhh... Fancy-schmancy Danga Bay International Restaurants. Here's where the bold and the beautiful people of JB come to see and be seen during the night. :) And the young come to paktoh during the day :P Me? Being neither bold and beautiful, nor young, I'm just a wannabe in lime green patterned beach shorts and a purple tank top :P I know, I know... Colour so the clashing :P SO?

See the yacht in the distance? Minus the sails, yeah..

Foon Yew High School has a kayak-ing team!! Damn, I wished my school had one, too! I was quite green with envy :)

Have you seen a cloud with a halo?? I was quite entranced :)

Here's a close-up

3) Leaving Danga Bay

Supposedly, I was told, and do not quote me here, this is the Clock Tower of JB. Apparently, every self-respecting reasonably old city should have a clock tower :P

I think this is the Sultan Abu Bakar Mosque. :) I sure hope I read the sign right.

The Palace Museum, JB. According to my friend, the royal family used to live here. Now, well, people come here to jog. The palace grounds is quite a lovely place for some exercising, apparently. Breathe the air the royals used to breathe :P

The stairway of the Palace Museum

TADA!! The tale of 23 November 2006 comes to an end. That's all, folks!!

Friday, November 24, 2006

Malaysia's greatest ability...

Malaysia's greatest ability...

is to waste taxpayer's money....

Yerdeh said that this site would interest me.

She was most certainly right. It most certainly did. I reckon that's 'cos it interested her, too. We share similar sentiments on certain issues. Because that was exactly what I felt when about a month ago, I saw the news spread on the FRONT PAGE of local newspapers. Malaysia's first MALE astronaut (emphasis mine). WHOOPDEEDOOO!!! Malaysia SO Boleh, you know? When people are dying around the world, and schools in the interior of Sabah, Sarawak, states like Kelantan, Terengganu and Pahang have little/ NO electricity to go by (but must have at least ONE computer in the school. The irony...) we SHOULD rejoice for sending a Malaysian penis of a certain disposition out to space by another country's space programme. Because we are Malaysians. And we should do what the government says we should do. Bow, and we shall bow. Skip, and we shall skip. Eat dirt, and by Tuhan Maha Esa, we shall eat dirt. Be silent, and we be silent. Call Singapore ingrates, and we should.

The writer most certainly hit the nail on the head when he wrote about KLCC. And Cyberjaya/ Putrajaya. I feel no pride in those. Those are not OUR achievements. Putrajaya is a dead bogus administrative city. Cyberjaya/ Putrajaya does not even have graffitti on its walls. Not because the inhabitants are such loyal, caring subjects.... but because... WHAT inhabitants? There is almost NOTHING there. Besides some companies, government administration and some colleges.

I take no pride in Sepang. Or KLIA. Our architects did not build all these. Neither did our civil engineers. How many Malaysians were involved in these from conception to birth, or even growth and maintenance? For me, these were MAJOR excesses. We waste good money on stupid toys that are quite useless other than as a white elephant. What do we need a tallest building in the world for? So we can feel how much it shakes when there's an earthquake in Indonesia? Wastefulness...

Tell me I'm wrong. But I'm of the opinion that if men would stop comparing the sizes of their guns, literally and figuratively, the world would be a much better place. Women are too busy going through mood swings, and dealing with menstrual cramps, and childbirth, and looking after their spouses' needs, and the needs of the children their men helped spawn but forgot to bring up to have time or energy for such idiocy. And then they need time to look after their own welfare, too. Just in case that penis of a man she hooked up with dumps her old, lardy ass for a pair of younger tits and a bigger mouth. Men so love their blows, after all. They may have two heads, but they can only use one at one time. More wastefulness...

At least, without such idiocy, there'd be more emphasis on the important things. Education, Welfare, Healthcare. Basic Human Rights. Not whose GUN is bigger than whose. Friggin' 'ell.

When I was studying in Serdang, the university was the cheapest before my intake. For my intake, the fees were considerably more expensive than other similar universities. The computer system was totally fucked, but the money we spent on fees were being used for the 'beautification' of the administration building. Lord above, I was spitting nails. Ugly, humongous, white, immoveable cement balls all around the admin building. That was what I was paying good money for. And YET there is no correlation between the Treasury, the Academic Office and the Student Affairs Department. WONDERFUL. But the money is spent on imbecilic white balls. YAY! Can you feel my joy, just thinking about it?

This ridiculous penchant for wasting money is the precise reason why certain people should not be allowed to hold office and be in control of Malaysia's economy (re: previous post). It is obviously so deeply rooted that, if they have it in the level of the grassroots (universities), what wishful thinking does one have that it won't happen at cabinet level? (Which it did, btw. At the Ministry of Science and Technology (the latest folly) to be precise. (re: Malaysia's bogus space programme))

I rest my case, babydolls. I rest my case.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Yerdeh directed me to this URL, and wanted to know what I thought. I was about to post this answer on the person's comments, but thought I'd put it up as a post instead:

'well.... wow.... and they wonder why they're still poor? if every single Chink in M'sia left the country, cos we are 'immigrants', let's see how well the Malaysian economy would hold out. :) after 35 years, Bumiputras have 'SLOWLY gained back what has long belonged to them' to quote our 'brilliant friend' there. 35 years!! and it's still slow. what does that say about them, eh? ;) in that 35 years, how different Singapore with their 'marginalised Malays' have grown in terms of technology and economy! Do u hear Singaporean Malays making any noises about marginalisation? *yawn...* and the government complains about brain-drain. why stay in a country where lower life forms , like the idiot who wrote that letter, are being given superior treatment? why stay in a country that openly marginalises u and treats u like pondscum? there are times i feel so wonderfully appreciated... really... like now.'

You know, I have wonderful Muslim friends. They are brilliant, funny, smart. And they don't say stupid shit like that. Because they know that, in human relations, race and religion doesn't really matter. And I love them all: Madz, Hanie, Reza, to name just a very few off-hand.

I'd like to paraphrase Shakespeare in The Merchant of Venice, when Shylock said:

Hath not a *insert race/ religion here* eyes?
Hath not a *** hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions?
Fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons,
subject to the same diseases, healed by the same means,
warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer, as a *** is?
If you prick us, do we not bleed?
If you tickle us, do we not laugh?
If you poison us, do we not die?

Really, doth not the same blood flow in our veins? Doth not the same flesh cover our bones? So what if the colour of our skin is different? We are all human. We feel, we care, we hurt. Could we please stop the hurting? Please? What good does it do to us?

:( what's this place coming to?

:( what's this place coming to?

This is terrible. I can't say much, being non-Muslim and all, but what is this place coming to?

I have to believe....

I have to believe....

that God walks with me every step of the way.

When I'm dragging my feet, he supports me still. When I'm down and out, and terribly fatigued, he holds me up.

I have to believe....

Friday, November 17, 2006

In Johor

In Johor

:) I is in Johor!! Woohoooo!!!!! ;) Will be sending postcards soon :P Much needed break from city life :) It was great to smell kampong air again :)

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

i was bored...

i was bored...

Just got back from a get-together with a couple of my coursemates and an O&G we know. Yeahh... a lot to think about now in terms of career prospect. It's quite daunting.So I decided to entertain myself...

Here are two tests I did :P

Your Career Personality: Detail-Oriented, Observant, and Hard-Working

Your Ideal Careers:

Family counselor
Independent store owner
Interior decorator
Museum curator
Preschool teachers
Social worker
Stay at home parent

You Are 54% Feminine, 46% Masculine

You are in touch with both your feminine and masculine sides.
You're sensitive at the right times, but you don't let your emotions overwhelm you.
You're not a eunuch, just the best of both genders.

Hrmm... So I was right... Am not much of a girly girl... :P

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Fuck-me red shoes

Fuck-me red shoes

I've finally found me my perfect pair of fire-engine red fuck-me shoes. Peep-toe, approximately 4' high so I can actually walk in them, they're gorgeous, and I'm deliriously happy. A little tight, though, but a size larger causes my feet to slip. So I guess I won't be using them for anything more substantial than looking gloriously gorgeous :P Mmmm... ;) They came in a beautiful black, too. But I don't exactly grow money on trees, pity.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Doggie pics!

Doggie pics!

The long overdue pics :)

The Pups



Afro annoying China :D

Afro annoying Brazil :D

Africa and Brazil :D

No photo of Africa (Afro) on its own cos it was too busy a) eating b) disturbing the other pups :P Heh heh...

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Courage in the Face of Fear

Courage in the Face of Fear

Thursday, November 9, 0347 hours

This blog is emotional and ponderous :P , and partially inspired by recent events and long evaluation (a result of nothing better to do :P). I doubt the person who inspired it reads my blog, but even so, I'm writing it anyway :P I need writing's cathartic effect to exorcise some personal demons.

There are days when I wish I were five again. Running around full of zest for life. Life was a wonder to explore. Everything was fresh, new, uncomplicated. And fear was not in the dictionary. Now that I am older, there are so many things to fear. Was it experiences that taught me that? Or was fear an acquired experience in itself?

Fear. What's the ultimate fear? Possibly the fear of failure. What I fear is the intangible things. What I fear most is, yes, precisely that. The fear of failure. The failure to see what is there. The failure to see what is NOT there. The failure to do what is right. The failure to SEE what is right. The failure to let go when I should. The fear of failure. I fear it. I have fallen into a depression so dark and so deep, I'm still learning how to handle the ramifications of it. Sometimes, the incident that caused it still gives me nightmares, and makes me wake up in the still of the night, shivering in cold sweat. That fear. That fear has driven contless people to suicide, some mistakenly thinking suicide to be the braver option in comparison to facing harsh, cold reality.

But, I wonder, is suicide really the better option? Me, being a Catholic, might not be a good judge of that, my thoughts on suicide certainly having been coloured by my faith. Suicide, in the eyes of the Catholic Church, is gravely forbidden by the fifth commandment, as 'it is a grave offense against the just love of God, of self and of neighbour' (methinks). Didn't the Bible call our body the temple of God?

Personally, I think suicide a short-sighted solution. It is, quite possibly, the ultimate sign of cowardice. For instance, say if Person A wants to commit suicide due to something that happened between Person A and Person B, has A ever thought of how his particular actions might affect B? So A was temporarily insane when he contemplated suicide, and in a moment of pure selfishness thought it was the easiest way all around, but did he ever think to wonder of how B would feel should he have taken his own life? There's a sad but beautiful song called 'Whiskey Lullaby' that describes the consequences of suicide pretty well. If B were me, I'd have loved to be sarcastic and tell A: 'Please, don't murder yourself on my account, I'd hate to have your guilt and death burdening my conscience.' Yes yes, I is stubborn, arrogant, elitist, moralistic *bleep*. Not to mention tude and crude as well. I know, I know, poor A would probably have jumped off a cliff there, thinking: 'B HATES ME!! I HATE ME!!' :P

Hrmm... I really do think coming face-to-face with our own weaknesses and faults, admitting we're wrong, taking responsibility for the ramifications of our own actions, and trying to get help to help ourselves is a way more difficult, painful and courageous option.

THAT is courage in the face of fear. And that's what I'm working towards. I hope I'm getting there.

When I decided to take a hiatus from blogging on the counsel of a dear and trusted friend due to her concerns, it was quite painful to hear what she had to say. But I listened, I contemplated, and I learnt. I hope I'm a better person for it. She wasn't all correct about me, but I wasn't all correct about me, either :) She doesn't quite understand how I need my writing for it's cathartic effect, though deeply personal, but I know what she was trying to say about not putting it all out there and finding options for my negative 'qi'.

We all need time to heal. This year is a year of many losses for me. It's a personal 'cleaning out my closet' year. And my... what cobwebs I find :P But all is not lost, however. I counted my blessings. And they were good. I'm counting my blessings still. Hopefully by the end of the year, the proverbial 'ka-ching' of the proverbial cash register would register a net gain.

:) Always look on the bright side of life and do not hold grudges, I think. It only serves to eat you up inside and make you bitter, angry, resentful, hateful. And in the end you loathe yourself as much as the one you loathe. No good for personal karma :) So I learn to let go. Better to let go of something that's making you feel sad, learn from it, and move forward than to hold on to that sadness and stay in a rut, isn't it? Careful, though. Moving forward and looking forward are two very different things. I think Bren and June would agree. Hor? :)

When one has fallen to the deepest end of the pit, there's no more way to go, but up, right? When in trouble (end of pit), wallowing in self-pity (avoiding the issue, getting angry, feeling sorry for myself) has never done me any good. Two wrongs never made a right. I have to get my hands dirty, sort through my shit (climbing my way up and out) and struggle to set myself free (getting out of said pit). Not easy is an understatement.

But I take comfort in knowing that Christ Himself suffered in His Paschal Mystery (His passion and death on the cross for us). You think He had it easy? :P When He suffered and died, He was true Man, and experienced the same pain we would have felt. When He conquered His fears, thus conquering death, that was when the Incarnate Son in accomplishing His divine plan, became the embodiment of true God. Which is why Christians the world over proclaim Christ to be both true Man and true God. The way of the Cross is filled with thorns, and like Simon of Cyrene, we stumble and fall along the way. But I think we shouldn't be discouraged. I'm not exactly good Christian example. In fact, I think I suck. Big time. I do, sometimes, try to incorporate Christianity into my day-to-day living. 'Cos that's what it means to be Christian, to me. There's more to Christianity than MLM-type church-planting. Christianity should encompass every facet of living.

And certainly, from all that I've learnt and experienced so far, Christianity is never the easier option. It is a struggle. I may have my own differences about the Church's stand on many issues, and those who know me well know about my concerns regarding organised religion and absolutism in its purest form, but I do agree with their stand regarding the sanctity of human life, human dignity, and thus, suicide. We should have the courage to work through our issues. Don't take the coward's way out. We might get burnt a little for it, but we shall come out on the other side burnished and tinged with maturity, having gone through trial and purification by fire. Life is scarier than death, really. With life comes great power. And we all know the popular quote on power. With great power, comes great responsibility. And that is the scary bit, isn't it?

Wouldn't you agree, though? What is there to fear about death? Apart from the sorrow of leaving behind what we know and love, and worked for. And having those we leave behind who love us feel sadness that we've gone. For me, it is in death that we celebrate life. Because what do we leave behind in our deaths? What legacy would we have left? It is the memory of us that is carried on in the hearts and minds of the friends that we have made. That memory is what outlives us.

I know I am being morbid here, but hey, I'm weird, right? Like I told a friend, I'm normal enough to know I'm weird, but weird enough to not really care. I shouldn't let society's norms dictate what makes me happy :D I should find my own path, and go out in a blaze of glory! ;)

And I hope that at my death, I would have touched enough people in my life to be remembered with fondness. And my friends would give me a 'MOVING, SOULFUL EULOGY'... Yes?.... Girls?......... Ermmm.... Boys?.......... *deafening...... magnanimous....... SILENCE........* me: sighs..... :P

Currently listening to: Brad Paisley, Alison Krauss-Whiskey Lullaby
Currently reading: Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church
Currently craving for: Pork trotters in soy sauce and black vinegar :P

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Losing my Connection

Losing my Connection

It's been said that if you love something/ someone, let it go, and if it comes back to you, it's yours. I don't know if it's true. What I do know is that it's pointless holding on to something/ someone that doesn't a) belong to you, b) want to be yours. What I do know, also, is that life is precious, and that time is short, and we should live life to the hilt whilst we can. Carpe Diem, Carpe Noctum! :) Easier said than done, no?

There are so many restrictions. Physical, emotional, psychological. There are so many voices in my head, sometimes I do not know who to listen to. One pulling me this way, another pulling me that way. There are days I wish I were the Indian goddess with a thousand hands. Other days I wish I had the power of omnipresence. But I don't, I am but human after all. And I make do.

Funny the twists and turns of life. Funny how you wish you could run away from your past, but it always catches up with you. Funny how you try to change yourself, but in the end, your essence remains the same, and you are still who you always were, and always will be. And how your closest friends could sometimes know you better than you know yourself. And how sometimes the people you just met could read you better than you'd like. And how you can't outrun yourself. Or lie to yourself. Funny how there are things you wish you could forget, and you thought you had put them behind you, buried deeply in the darkest recesses of your mind, in a proverbial oak trunk whose key you thought you had tossed down the proverbial Marina Trench, but drat that trigger-memory, because somehow, somewhere, something, sometime, they would come back to haunt you. The people you chose, the decisions you made, the path not taken... 'What if..', 'If only..'. These are the most painful phrases in the English language. Life throws us curve balls. How do we know we are making the right choices when it does?

And funny how you meet the people you thought you'd never meet again/ perhaps you wish you'd never meet again under the strangest of circumstances. What are the chances? What's the probability? In a train station, when the person normally drives. In a church, in the very pew you are sitting on, on your first day there, when you normally don't go to church, and the person, if you remember right, wasn't much of a church person either. In a mamak, with your friends. At work, in an industry so different from which either of you trained for. At a music festival. Walking home through a park, and the person was jogging. In a shopping complex. Is this place getting too close for comfort? Some reacquaintances are delightful, some are not.

Ghosts from the past. Would there be apparitions from the future? Deja vu.

Funny, too, how prayers are answered. I do believe God answers all my prayers. In His own way, in His own time. Perhaps not how I wish it to be, but in a way that makes me stronger. I have to remind myself always: do we pray because we want something, out of selfish reasons, as a means to obtain what we want, or do we pray because it's God's will we're seeking to fulfil? Filial trust. All faith is blind, therefore, it's important to choose wisely in whom to place one's faith. Am I wrong? I do not know. Someday I'll find out.

I miss my internet connection. It's the one thing linking me to human civilisation, sometimes :) Since I must make use of the Internet when I can, and be thankful of what I have when I have it, I shall blog when I can :) My blog-draught is semi-over :P No daily blogging, though. I shall blog when I have the chance, and when I damn well please :D

Doggie pictures not here. Will post it up when I can :)