Monday, March 16, 2009

Unconditional

Confusion

some people do not believe in second chances... for them, it's too little too late.

while others do. others think that people would need their space to grow and to learn. and it's good sometimes to have a breather.

for me, i don't know... i do believe that in everything in life, a person should not be judged by the mistakes that they made, but by their capacity to learn (i.e., to not repeat their mistakes)

people are human after all, and we fell many many times before we finally learnt how to walk.

i also do think that if both parties' values and principles are aligned, both are willing to compromise, second chances are possible... 

and yet, i don't know... i'm confused...

Saturday, March 14, 2009

misanthrope?

i was talking to a friend. one of my best buddies. probably the sister i never had.

and i just realised i had income tax forms to fill... so i called dad for awhile. i know very little about income taxes.

mom picked up the phone. dad was driving. he was taking her out for dinner and a 'walk-around' cos she's stressed. she's gonna have an exam on thursday, or something :P

i told C that. and we both commented how adorable my parents were... SO KIIIUUUUTTTTT!!! yeah...

and she said:

awwww so cuteeeeeeeee
:P
i like cute parents
u know what?
8:04pm

me:
yeah me too 
what what?
8:04pm

C:
i tink our parents generation is the last to be togehter gehter till the end
u know?
the new parents now... omfg they scare me
triple divorces
kids everywhere

and she's right...

i replied:

yeah i know what u mean abt divorces
so sad
n that's what 
i'm afraid of
ppl nowadays
too many choices
too much temptation
n yet not trained to have any willpower
it's the age of self-gratification 
make that INSTANT self-gratification :(

isn't it?

so many choices, but less trained to willpower.

so much technological telecommunications, iPhone, computers, high-speed broadband... yet so little communication.

it's disappointing, really.

and it makes me cry.

and it makes me so afraid of committing to a relationship.

our generation- always looking for easy answers to everything. too afraid to work hard for something worthwhile. taking things for granted...

i see so many people getting married, those around my age: and within 5 years, the veneer of a perfect marriage comes crashing down, and what's left for all the world to see is an acrimonious, ugly divorce. mud-slinging everywhere. where was the love that brought them together in the first place?

the anger, the misunderstanding, the lies, the bitterness: not to sound cliche, but where is the love?

what happened to forever? what happened to the security and solidity of marriage? what happened to wedding vows? to honour, love and respect?

Do not think that love in order to be genuine has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies. ~Mother Teresa~ 

yet this is SUCH an achievement nowadays. to love without getting tired.

to be 55 and still going on dates. to be 70 and still holding hands...

loving without getting tired. it's so rare nowadays.

wasted

i pushed. because i knew there were bigger things he could definitely achieve if only he weren't afraid to try.

because i cared. for him. and for him to have a better life.

because i wanted him to have dreams again and to reach out and achieve them.

but it's all in vain. does he appreciate it? no.

i stand no chance. i never did.

it's all wasted effort after all.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Forgive Me

after many of leona's very staid song... i find this to be quite refreshing. however, i find the official music video to this song quite silly, and much prefer this instead. the editting done to match lipstick jungle's scenes to this song was also pretty well done. and heyy... that buckley boy is hawt ;)



lyrics here:

There's a first time for everything 
It's definitely one of them nights 
I knew when I looked in his eyes 
That he was gonna be trouble for me 
I never wanted to lie 
I knew that my baby would cry 
If he knew what we were doing 
But if his love don't pass the test 
I gotta get it from somewhere else 
When I'm gone and I need a man 
Hope he understands 
Forgive me baby 

I gotta take a chance tonight 
So I'm gonna be myself; And I
Can't wait no more 
Sitting all alone 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
I can wait no more 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 

Been a long time since I 
Did something good for myself 
But why should I be put through hell? 
He's doing what he wanna do 
I finally found somebody else 
Who really wants to make me feel 
Things that I've been missing so long 
And his love always passed the test 
It's a shame I had to look somewhere else 
When I'm gone and I need a man 
I just hope that he understands 
Forgive me baby 

I gotta take a chance tonight 
So I'm gonna be myself; And I
Can't wait no more 
Sitting all alone 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
I can wait no more 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 

Forgive me but I need to feel loved too 
Forgive me but I can't wait around for you 
Forgive me if I found a man 
Who understands just what I need 
Forgive me but I need to feel loved too 
Forgive me if I can't wait around for you 
Forgive me if I found a man who understands 
Forgive me baby 

I gotta take a chance tonight 
So I'm gonna be myself; And I
Can't wait no more 
Sitting all alone 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
Hope you forgive me 
Oh oh 
I can wait no more 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me 

I gotta take a chance tonight 
So I'm gonna be myself; And I 
Can wait no more 
Sitting all alone 
Man, I really hope 
Hope you forgive me
Baby

~Leona Lewis' Forgive Me~