Tell me what to do... cos I'm not sure if I've already burnt out.

Because I'm just so tired.

I almost broke out in tears today at work.... I felt so overwhelmed.

And then finding out he was gonna break yet another promise. It was just too much for me to bear.

I know he's not going through the best of times, and neither am I.

But at least, I still wanna do what I can do to keep things exclusive, to keep things going.

Perhaps he feels differently, I don't know.

I don't know if this still makes me happy, honestly.

I feel more ambivalent than anything else nowadays.

I still love him, very much so.

Yet.... I'm not sure if things will go as far as I thought they would go 2 years ago.

I know I'm clinging to my career... cos it seems like that's the only seemingly sure thing I've got right now.

Cos although I'd like to count on him... I'm not sure if I could, or if I should. He has his own troubles, too. And I'm not even sure if he knows what he wants yet.

I'm afraid for myself, really. Lately, all I've been feeling very much of is weariness, disappointment and sadness.

I'm burning out fast, if I'm not yet already there. And I don't know what to do anymore... for so many things in my life.