Blog Trawling... and the Male vs. Female perspective

I haven't been out trawling blogs for a long while... and this morning, while waiting, I went to visit a friend's blog...

If you're one of those idiots who ask me things like: What makes women think that men want to be anything else other than what they are? Well, this particular blog, and my response should be enough: What makes men think they can have everything without a little sacrifice? Women do not ask you to be completely different, but to make steps to be a BETTER person.

Here is her blog, from a married perspective...

I suppose she was writing about her disappointment (and mind you, she was a newly minted newly-wed) of how things do not necessarily change (despite many promises) for the better after marriage. People make their own choices whether or not to change. Other people may nag, but ultimately.... if a person wants to be a stubborn mule, they would remain one. 

People can promise the moon and stars, but action speaks louder than words.

Do take note, italics and bold and different colour/ font sizes were her own emphasis, not mine.

Why I'm not releasing her name, or her link, is because she chose to remain anonymous, writing with a moniker, and I'm not having the same morons who come to MY site to bitch about ME, go over to hers and throw the same kind of tantrum.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

V-Day

Nothing. (Ok, sorry.. I was offered dinner. But going out for dinner right after work, feeling danky in my sweat and in my drabby casual wear? I don't think so .. I wanted to go home first. Then there was complaint on how bad the jam would be. Major turn off. Actually.. you want or don't want to take me out for a nice dinner? If jam also, you can spend time talking to me on the way there and have quality conversation. If really sincerelah, can you do it properly? Instead of .. aiyah .. chin chai lar. Don't you know women like to be romanced? And romancing takes effort and sometimes sacrifice?)

Birthday also nothing. Even my siblings got me chocolates, a card and a really cool looking pen. Even my boss, bought all of us a simple Valentine's Day Lunch.

A friend was saying, "Aiyah all guys are like that wan lah. Married dy can't be bothered ma. More chin chai already"

From this post, I may sound like an insistent, nagging, materialistic woman with expectations sky high. But little do people understand the actual fact. His friend actually said to me the other day: "Aquarians are usually misunderstood." Nobody really bothers to think things differently: it's always easier to blame or think negatively. I'm going to give benefit of a doubt and publish this post tomorrow just to prove a point. I know some will say, you never gave a chance for the person to redeem himself. Like perhaps I'm just quick to blame coz who knows ma, he could have had something planned. Or by me posting this early you're saying he's got no chance to prove me wrong. So ok .. note the publishing time... it is now 10.13AM, 14th February 2008 - Valentine's day. I'm just posting this tomorrow to give benefit of a doubt.

Why do I bitch? Because you bragged. Had you had not bragged about how good and romantic you are, I would not have remembered you ever set the bar that high for yourself, then... I also won't expect as much. Don't tell me you are, then not do it; coz then I'd say you're all talk and no action. Everyone CAN, if they really want to and make the effort to.

To me it's not always the price of it monetarily(like getting me something really expensive), but more the giving of one's self - a small sacrifice. Take for instance a friend is real broke, but still manage to spend RM2.30 on a birthday card. It's the action that counts because as blur as I may be at times, I do see and note your efforts. In fact, it would mean so much more to me, knowing that despite being really broke, you were still willing to spend some on a sweet little card. THAT action is precious to me and makes me see how precious I am to you. I'm also pro something nice and creative(like even if you made your own card), coz then it would mean you took time to plan it properly.

It's a bit like Christian tithing; though some may struggle giving away a fraction of their "security", imagine how honored God must feel that you actually sacrificed and practice faith that He will provide ALL of your NEEDS.

The jizz here for being the romantic person you say you are, is not so much the amount, to me anyways. I'm sure a lot of women would disagree; gushing that anything expensive is a sure thing to their hearts. I'm not saying it doesn't, generally, but it is not a must and not a marker for me to sum up how much a person loves.

It's the fact that you willingly gave what little that you have. THAT to me, is a precious action in itself.

I know you'd argue that the way everyone show love is subjective. But think again, if you're trying to impress the one you love, you WILL have to do it HER way. Not your way. OR better yet, if your way doesn't seem to cut it. Why do you keep at it? Why not change methods and be open about other ways. Coz when you do that, then you make clear effort to get to know her: what she likes and enjoys, her character and mannerisms. Nothing impress a women more than being noticed and being understood.