Tuesday, January 16, 2007

What I Don't Like

What I Don't Like

Wednesday, 10.01.2007. 0704 hours.

Maybe I'm not the kind of girl who gambles.

Maybe I'm not the kind of girl who seizes the day.

Or makes the first step.

Maybe I don't like to take risks, especially emotional ones.

Or maybe emotional attachments are just not my thing.

Maybe I don't like to be that person to just go ahead and put myself out there.

I have a friend, a guy friend who says that I have to go elsewhere to find relationship happiness. That Malaysian boys, in general, just aren't hardworking enough (oh! I will probably get many hatemails for this, but I wasn't the one who said this. A dude admitted it.) They like it easy. They like it on a platter. They don't want to make that effort.

Why should they, when so many girls throw themselves at them and spread themselves out there like a buffet table?

'Pick me!' 'Try me!' 'Choose me!' 'Love me!'

So many other available cunts... so why bother with the difficult one?

It's crazy, that buffet table. So I step back away from the craziness and just hold myself to myself. And keep away even if it kills me.

Or maybe I just don't like emotional attachments. Just not my thing.

Getting emotionally attached drains you. It puts too much at jeopardy. You can't think straight.

Emotional attachments make you human. But it also makes you vulnerable. To hurt. To pain. To every crazy emotion out there.

It makes you biased. It makes you make rash decisions.

Emotional attachments make you lose your edge. Getting emotionally involved makes you stupid.

I Don't Like Emotional Attachments.

There's a whole long list of things I DON'T like.

Emotional Attachments? Tops the list.

So why can't I extract myself? And put up a distance? And build a wall no one can scale? Why do I get that adrenaline rush when I do something I know I shouldn't be doing?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Maybe smaller town is greener pasture. Less buffet selection, more hardworking, traditional, 'i hunt wife' type mentality.